I have this old beat up guitar, my brother carried it with him around home back in the late 60's. Yeah I am that old.

My mom took all the fun out of music. We had to learn scales. My brother conquered my Mother, a steel string classical guitar. I stole his guitar. He died in Viet nam.

No one knows how I play. That is ok. My uncle Carl got me a few gigs in the studio. My Mom paid for 16 years of lessons....and I have spent much time in the wind and rain...much time laughing about a personal harvest.

I have never cried for Kenny while holding his guitar, I don't think that would be right. I have seen Water Street in Skowhegan plain as day, I have felt salt and spray from the Peaks Island mail run, but I have never cried. He danced across the things I fret about. But I never cried holding his guitar.

It is a dark thing held in for so long. I survived Vince Gill in a closed environment and never cried. There must be something wrong with me? Because that guitar tunes perfectly.

Transitional Offices

There is an old line from an older song "you don't know what you've got till it's gone". I use to have a 30'x30' office in a business that I get a "no-show" check from. It was a business that I had to do nothing for and still made me money. It is funny how life works out.

The business has had to recently expand, which suddenly demanded my involvement. A new building was acquired, and thus the transition of moving. My large office is now two smaller offices. One in the old location and one in the new location. Now granted my office in the new location is going to become a larger three room affair. But today, it is frustrating. This is strange considering I never used the old office for anything more than glorified storage for things I have collected throughout my life that demanded formal display.

Sure I would occasionally go there sit around pondering things and making others nervous. But now, it seems like a weight that demands attention. It isn't the social club for the crew that it use to be. I am actually having to work, correspond, and network with the movers, shakers, and money changers of the glass industry. I gotta tell ya, growth sucks when you are comfortable. I suppose that is where the phrase "growing pains" comes from.

In another corner of my life I am an hourly employee in a job that I just phreaking love. (Don't ever tell the folks at Greenlife grocery, but I would pay them to work there.) I watch my co-workers hungrily struggle to advance....it makes me wish I had someone like that to growl and grab to the point that I could just go back to a large office I rarely use.

When it rains, it pours. I have got to review the Department of Energy's DE-FOA-0000259 Funding Opportunity Announcement. I have until the 27th of September to understand the questions and until the 5th of October to have the proposals in. On top of that Natalia wants her hard wood floors that we have discussed for the last two years in by the 8th of September. She has even bought the wood flooring and hired the contractor......damn I miss my big no show office.

What really scares me is? I have these offices in three other states with growth issues in each.

Life is a bitch....

So I am closing a million dollar deal. I had no idea I was worth so much. I mean I knew I was worth 1.2. 6 years ago. Today my signature alone is worth 3.5. Not counting research or arguments. My wife who works for my bank....stands amazed behind me. I just bought a building for 1.1 million. Been negotiating for months.

My whole life smells of this deal.

It has been long ago photographs, It has been seasons
a long way down this road.
Traces of history
things believed in
passed along the way
a signature worth so much
I am not young enough for this
I can't even pray on my knees
but I am worth this?

My Grandmother told me
Angels sang the day I was born
she asked me everyday what damage I did
what I loved? What was tho color of crusades
Rivers we all jump into...

sunshine drying to 3. 5 million.

But I stood my ground
understood directional freedom
remembered every word ever said
by hero's and sorry newspaper headlines.
mortal lightening never impressed me.
I was the consummate diapered
trust fund baby. I learned young
to say "Fuck You".
I was photographed on stairways.
with mirrors around chasing feelings
announcing today I am what i have always hated.

questions and reasons, reflections of strangers
seeing it happen, forgiveness is to blame
soft as tenderness, along a Stone coast of youth?
A paper is slid to you and by signature?

you become what you loath.

Embed with or Inbed with

Here is a picture of General Stanley McChrystal. It was taken during a news conference. Notice the wire going to his ear? It attaches to a staff of personally chosen spooky operators who provide him with answers to questions asked by reporters. Why? Because he is a total control freak.

Which makes it all the funnier that his 30 year career in The United States Special Operations Command was ended by a Rolling Stone reporter named Mike Hastings. Hastings was a reporter "embedded" with McChrystal and his band of merry operators when they all got a little buzzed in Paris. Hastings wrote an article for Rolling Stone Magazine where he quoted McChrystal and staff making statements that were obviously violations and offenses under the UCMJ. McCrystal was fired and his staff are presently under investigation by the Army's Inspector General. Which means that our "Free Press" did it's job.

However now the Pentagon has determined that Mike Hastings is no longer allowed to be "embedded" with troops in Afghanistan on the grounds that he cannot be trusted.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100804/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/us_mcchrystal_rolling_stone_writer

The reason we have a free press in this country is so that the public will be informed when our Generals cross the line concerning our civilian authority over our military. This incident proves the value of our free press and proves that Hastings can indeed be trusted to do what the press is suppose to do in a free society; report.

Someone needs to tell the Pentagon the word is "embed", and does not mean "in bed with". A free press is not something we should be prepared to surrender to those stalwarts of honesty that make up our military leadership.

http://www.dailyfinance.com/story/media/rolling-stone-writer-mcchrystal-pals-were-lying-about-ground/19574011/

One last thing? I think the Army's Inspector General should also take a good long hard look at what McChyrtals band of merry operators were up to when all those classified files were released to wikileaks, unless of course they really think we are going to believe that was all done by a private first class? They should look into that before McChrystal announces his Presidential Candidacy.

A Poem That Has Nothing To Do With It's Title!

A Turtle Riding The Bus When The Bike Broke Down...

I know cowardice, have personally tasted it
In the deep end of the soul
Fear does not get you on the big things
It is far more insidious, like the tentacles of cancer.
Slow bus rides recalling strange sounds
That shouldn't be so alien
When by circumstance you are broken down
Huddled fear has time on it’s side
and nibbles away unexpectedly comfortable
Like foot and heel skin eating fish you pay for at the Spa.

True Fear? The sinful horror that charges you?
You never see it coming,
It is like crab grass growing up on you daily
Till one day you look around and it is all you see.
In the disconnection you hear
they give medals for instant courage
Jail time to thoughtful latter day hero’s?

I don’t think shelled Poets, should be allowed to touch guns
Little own aim them, with a trained finger.
The confusion would be overwhelming
A spiritual discourse of unwanted questions
posed to the 6 o'clock news and tomorrow's headlines.

Tinctured killings? Should be left to
17 year old Marines and
frat jock wannabes to worry about.
Homicidal Poets are just uncomfortable
like surplus combat boots purchased
for the stories they can tell...

Almost insulting.

Treading Water

Tiredly Treading Water In A Storm

When I was young, I never thought I would get this old
Swimming had more to do with suns than moons
Nothing was considered, it took an explosion
To get me where my parents wanted me.
Their solid beach footing.

Yet there were shadows
Sacrifices to the dark side of their currents
As an ant in the sand of their raising
I spent too much time crawling in damp tracks
Belly knowledge is sticky piss poor growth.
My legs only grew to walking
When I got away.

When I did it was classic
Fire to frying pan
My head, everything about me
Sizzled with freedom.
I was I in the Navy.
Every droplet was about me, but today?
I have a better kindness towards drowning.

Home was a cold wet memory
Cards flipped traditionally at Tea
Snow and burdened pine trees.
A coastal dog whistle in the wind.
That’s not to say it was all bad
There were days I pranced.
Inland unity cornfields I will drag to the end.
I will die smiling at Peaks Island
Mail Ferry’s, and a stone cottage
By circumstance I own on a stony beach
Shit happens when you live long enough.

Rivers and oceans, breathing must be down above water
Or you simply drown, even in two inches depth.
They say it is painless, filled with best wishes
At that last gasp? Are there Gale Winds?

ROFLMAO

Hey Folks, meet Bradley Manning, a 22 year old Private First Class serving with the 10th Mountain Division, as a clerk. Private Manning is the fella that the United States Military would have us believe gave Wikileaks 150 thousand secret documents concerning our war in Afghanistan.

This 22 year old Private managed according to his arrest documentation to compile an extensive archive of secret documents from the Army, the Navy, the Air Force, The State Department, The CIA, the Agency for International Development, The DIA, the Whitehouse and other agencies including private contractors. This child in uniform then managed to disseminate all of these "secret" documents to wikileaks. http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2548077/posts

http://bellum.stanfordreview.org/?p=2615

NO WAY! No phreaking way in hell could this guy have pulled this off. To even contemplate it is silly. To gather 150 thousand secret documents guarded by the US Military and then disseminate those documents would take a whole team of special operators. If a 22 year old Private can do this? Then we need to bug out of Afghanistan at once and review our entire military, quite possibly drug testing our military's Officer Corps.

I am just an old retired Sailor. My short term memory is in many ways shot to hell. But I do seem to recall that a couple of months ago there was a General who was in charge of our nations war efforts in Afghanistan that was fired? This General spent his entire career in The United States Special Operations Command and according to the Rolling Stone magazine article that got him fired carried nun-chucks and surrounded him self with an extremely loyal collection of Green Beret, Navy SEALs and other soldiers, sailors, Marines and civilians that the Military designate as "Operators". What makes more sense? A 22 year old Private, with less than one term of enlistment did this? Or a Command General with his team of "Operators" pissed off about what happened to their leader did this? Keep in mind that in the same Rolling Stone article General McChrystal spoke about how "computer weenies play an important part, and need to be brought into the fold of Special Operations". Also keep in mind 150 thousand files were collected, caroused, compartementilized, and downloaded to wikileaks...150 thousand files? All by a private first class?

I think this incredible leak of classified information is where General Stanley Allen McChrystal, announced his Presidential Candidacy. I also think that Barack Obama is in a tight spot. President Obama will not be able to campaign on "governmental transparency", or "change" ever again. President Obama also can not publicly and therefore politically admit that he has been played by a General he fired. That's a big time rock and hard spot by 2012. Welcome Mr. President, to the world of "Special Operations".

As for PFC. Bradley Manning? I am sure after the proper "motivation", and advice from counsel, he will plead guilty to all specifications of the UCMJ against him. He will receive a General Discharge under Honorable Conditions and just disappear into Corporate America.

The whole affair is sad, if you think about it. But yet it is brilliant, today the press is fixated on 90 thousand files released.

Makes you wonder about the value of the 60 thousand documents still laying out there in the tall grass?

Potato Words

Potato, Patato, Tomato, Tamato
For Richie and Sam, friends I let down

At the close of World War 2
There was a boat,

The USS Indianapolis
Missioned secretly to carry

the first Atom Bomb
So secretly that no one knew

they were alive
When torpedoed returning home
Of 1,196 souls aboard

880 hands were eaten by sharks over secrecy.

The Navy concluded officially
(I shit you not) “The loss of life was directly linked
To failure of team communication….”
Like those men and the feasting sharks didn’t know?
Secrets suck. I don’t expect you to understand
What I am trying to say, you are grocery store managers
Which in honesty leaves me an old man
who needs to, understanding such things, drink at the VFW
Next to secrets? Drama sucks second worst.

Being old, I have this half ingrown gray hair
across my ass That gets easily inflamed
when it experiences hyperbole being blown at it.
Wannabe kool aid drinkers screaming “Team”
Leaves me reaching for emotional Preperation H….
It is so hard for me to sit still for such things.
When it itches I scratch stupidly.
Some I suppose would call it “Post Something Or Other”.

Yet truthfully it is not Naval Special Warfare
No one dies. It isn’t even Salvation Army Disaster Services
No one starves or is left to cold elements
It is cleaning shitters, empting bus trays, mopping floors
It is a freaking grocery store.
It is time to porter the retired hair, join the VFW
Give up email discourses
Drink with those who will understand me
And know that I am quietly right.
That’s the best I can do. A vow of classified silence.
After all, you can’t blow smoke up an ass

You’ve plugged with a boot.

But you can haul up each morning in life

The Problem With Light Years...

The problem with time? Is that you have to place it in space. The old Baker-Nunn Cameras that tracked satellites and other things in the sky had a huge problem. They could track space, they could track time, they just couldn't wed the two. That is a classified secret.

I am a retired Spooky Sailor. An "Ivy Beller", a "Blue Knee" deeper than most, struggling with the compartments of my life, hanging out at a natural foods store. The store has recently been purchased by a national chain. Which makes me ponder the failures of the Baker-Nunn Cameras.

Today, someone asked "what does 'SOC' mean, everyone from the regional office signs their email with their name and 'SOC' ". I laughed and said SOC means "Special Operations Command" out of McDill. People looked at me like I was crazy. I hushed up, having already had a go round with the regional office over the word "team". They claim it, and define it, poorly.

Time and Space! It leaves me both chuckling, and pondering the light years: Where do the civilian corporations get their jargon from?

Phreaking Outstanding.

If you want to ponder or discuss the glass ceiling, how women are never taken seriously? Then Lt.Col. Brenda Cartier must be a part of the discussion. This woman just shattered a glass ceiling in the military that many "in the know" would have bet hard cash would never be shattered by a "split tail". This woman, just became the first Squadron Commander in the United States Special Operations Command. SOC is dear to my heart. Operating out of McDill, it does the "Quiet Shit"

Lt.Col. Cartier recently assumed command of the Air Force's 4th SOS Squadron, which employs the AC-130U, Gunships....often called the "Spooky". I met her once years ago when she was a Major. She was impressive then. Honestly however, I never thought she would break such a barrier. The United States Special Operations Command has been such a gung ho male dominated organization.

It is so beyond fitting that Lt.Col Brenda Cartier not only paved the way? But busted into the men's room. I have only one thing to say to the lady:

"HOOAH"

All I Can Do Is Shake My Head......

I have this bathroom, the size of a maximum security prison cell. Six feet by 8 feet. My wife decided to remodel it. She is my wife, I thought "adventure". Afterall, I have learned to take so much.

I suppose it was my mistake, I hired the contractors."With dreadlocks"...Yeah my mistake. They actually were good on the demolition. They got the the old walls, tub, and everything outta there with exhubarance. I even had a beer and played guitars with them......

It was on the rebuilding that they sucked....by then we were friends, to be taken advantage of. The walls of my shower are in....upside down, it is going to take creative enginneering to on my part to make this right.

Years ago, I served on a Submarine, where a shower was installed upside down. No one except those on a sub would know the maintianece requirements of that? "Overhead draft and water"....you can learn alot from that statement.

The Hippies charged me 5 thousand 200 bucks, to put my corner shower in. Upside down.I appriciate need. Isn't that the way things go? But I also remember who I am. I am the guy who's shower was put in upside down.

being forced to clean up after them, "dreadlock" contractors suck

You Have got to be kidding me?

You have got to be kidding me. A Master Russian Spy sent here (as the FBI claims) to become Americanized establishes a facebook page with a hundred something friends, 90 percent of who are Russians? Who meets with the undercover FBI agent receives a passport to give to another undercover FBI agent and then buys a phone using a fake name and an address of "99 fake street" calls her dad explains what is going on and is told by a Russian Father "take the passport to the local police turn it in and come home". Like a Russian father would say anything different?

Let us use an ounce of common sense shall we? If a heavy-duty undercover illegal spy was to call their contact in Moscow? Would they be told to go to a police station to turn in a fraudulent passport? Silliness.

Anna Chapman was arrested at a police station in New York trying to turn in to local police an undocumented United States Passport given to her by a FBI Agent with instructions to give it to another FBI agent. This was to say the least embarrassing to the FBI. She called her father; this is a documented fact. Now we have days later her ex husband making the claim that her father is ex KGB? Uh HUH! I wonder if FBI 302 reports will show agents of the FBI meeting with her ex after her arrest?

The day they remanded her without bail they called her a "highly trained agent and professinal deciever". All the press reports claimed she had been in "contact with her control agents". The FBI and press did not report that she had called her Dad and was arrested turning the contraband passport over to the local Police. Now, why do you suppose that is? No, the press reported what the FBI said "she had contact with her 'control agent'". The 28 year old woman in a foriegn country called her Dad.

Now days later, very late for the local US Attorney, who could have made much Hay out of her Dad being "ex-KGB" we have her ex-husband making the claim? Her father is ex-KGB? (I bet the US Attorney is pissed about this). After all the FBI claims they "followed this ring for years"? Yet, they didn't know Ms. Chapman's fathers occupation? Until a week after her arrest? When they convieniently discussed it with her ex husband and paraded him to the press 6 days after her arrest. Gimme a break!

It is convenient to explain away her call to her Father, by declaring her daddy to be ex KGB. It fills in some embarrassing holes in the FBI's story. However the FBI arrested 10 people who they can not in any way shape or manner link together? This whole "spying" is horseshit.

According to court documents filed by the FBI to date? The only thing these people are guilty of is being Russian and Internet chatting. Unless of course you believe that a highly trained foreign agent would take an undocumented passport to a local police station in a country that they are illegally spying in as opposed to taking a flight home?

SILLINESS, just silliness, a self-inflicted bite in the ass to the FBI!

Spy vs. Spy

Here is the face that the FBI wants us to believe is a threat to the security of The United States of America. A 28 year old party girl. It is laughable.

It is important to note that she and the other 10 Russians arrested (not indicted) were not charged with Espionage. They were charged with failure to disclose that they are agents of a foriegn government. Again Laughable. The law concerning failure to report as an agent of a foriegn government could by it's wording allow the FBI to charge many folks who are members of Synagogues or evangelical churches to be charged with being agents of the Israeli Government. For outspoken support of Israel and contacts with the Government of Israel. How many Evangelical Churchs organise trips to Israel with assistance of the Israeli government?

An undercover FBI Agent met with this 28 year old party girl gave her a passport to give to another FBI agent. She youthfully accepted the passport, then got nervous bought a cell phone and called family and friends in Russia who advised her to turn the passport into the local police which she did and was then arrested causing certain embarrasment to the FBI. Think about this you are a Mati Hari working for a foriegn government you get involved in what appears to be an entrapment operation? Are your case officers going to tell you to go to the local Police? This whole affair is freaking laughable.

Any information these party girls, real estate agents, and unemployed immigrants gave or possibly could have given to the Russian Government can more than easily be found on the internet...thus the lack of an "espionage charge".

I swear this has far more in common with Mad Magazine's "Spy vs. Spy" comic strip than a threat to the National Security of The United States of America. I agree with Putin who told a very silent Clinton, with a lifelong history of being outspoken: "Your Police are out of control"

The Cardinal, The Fixed and The Mutable of Tarot

Here is something I am very passionate about, the Tarot. You will see a pip wheel of the Minor Arcana that show the associations of the Minor Arcana Cards with the signs of the Zodiac. Each sign of the Zodiac is broken down to minor Arcana cards that rule the sign. For example Gemini is represented by the 8, 9 and 10 of swords. Libra is represented by the 2,3 and 4 of swords. Aquarius is represented by the 5, 6 and 7of swords.

Swords in the Tarot is Air, the astrological associations of Gemini is "Mutable Air", Libra is "Cardinal Air" and Aquarius is "Fixed Air". The three aspects of "Mutable" Cardinal" and "Fixed" are ruled by "Court Cards" in the Tarot.

All "Mutable" signs are ruled by Knights and mutable numbers are 8, 9 and 10 of each suit.

All "Cardinal" signs are ruled by Queens and cardinal numbers are 2, 3 and 4 of each suit.

All "Fixed" signs are ruled by Kings and fixed numbers are 5, 6 and 7 of each suit.

All the Mutables are 8, 9, and 10s Mutable signs are:
Gemini, Mutable Air, 8, 9 and 10 of Swords. Ruled by Knight of Swords.
Pisces, Mutable Water, 8, 9 and 10 of Cups ruled by Knight of Cups.
Sagittarius, Mutable Fire, 8, 9 and 10 of Wands Ruled by the knight of Wands
Virgo Mutable Earth, 8, 9 10 of Pentacles ruled by the Knight of Pentacles

The Cardinal are 2, 3, and 4s Cardinal signs are:
Libra Cardinal Air, 2, 3 and 4 of swords ruled by the Queen of Swords
Cancer Cardinal of Water, 2, 3 and 4 of Cups ruled by the queen of Cups
Aries Cardinal of Fire 2, 3 and 4 of Wands ruled by the Queen of Wands
Capricorn Cardinal of Earth, 2, 3 and 4 of Pentacles ruled by Queen of Pentacles

All the Fixed signs are 5, 6 and seven Fixed signs are
Aquarius fixed air, 5, 6 and 7 of swords ruled by King of Swords
Scorpio fixed Water, 5, 6 and 7 of Cups, ruled by King of Cups
Leo Fixed Fire, 5, 6 and 7 of Wands Ruled by King of Wands
Taurus Fixed Earth 5, 6 and 7 of Pentacles ruled by King of Pentacles.

Here is a good check to see the numerology of this. The number of "spiritual truth" is 9 as represented by the Hermit and the maxim of magic "Know thyself and know the world".

Cardinal numbers, 2, 3 and 4, 2+3+4=9
Fixed numbers 5, 6 and 7, 5+6+7=18, 1+8=9
Mutable numbers 8, 9 and 10, 8+9+10=27, 2+7=9

Examine the image above you will see it works. You will also see that the minor aces and royal pages are missing. Aces and Pages form what is known as the compass of Tarot. I'll get into that another time.

Oval Office Hyperbole

Tonight our President is going to address the nation from the Oval Office. In the time it takes him to make this speech, thousands of gallons of oil will be released into the Gulf of Mexico. When the speech is over pundits will begin to spin...oil will still be released.

BP, months prior to this disaster informed their shareholders that they had tapped into one of the largest oil reservoirs found to date. They bragged about how they had to quickly move tankers to off load the oil found and that the well produced in such heavy measures that tankers were required to relieve pressure. This well that is leaking has a potential to pollute the entire Atlantic. Mark my words, it is June 2010, by August it will be around the horn of Florida and as far North as the Carolina costs. It will still be gushing 2 years from now....5 years from now...10 years from now! Oval office spin is not going to change that. This well can gush for a generation.

Once it gets into the gulf stream of the eastern seaboard it will effect rainfall. Rain will become percentage slick. Imagine a drive on Interstate 95 in heavy rain? Imagine rain on crops? Imagine a major Hurricane cutting through the Gulf?

Obama lost me when he sat next to Haley Barber and encouraged tourists to come to the Gulf Coast. He is the President of the United States, he KNOWS what a disaster this is...yet he sits next to a fat ass status quo politician taking a "c'mon down" approach?

This oil spill has been out of control for months, it will be out of control for years....possibly decades. We need honesty, not spin. We need the President to be honest, and encourage Gulf Coast residents to consider moving.

There are things in life that you just can't make up!

So there is this 6 story high Jesus in Monroe Ohio. Some call it the "Touch Down Jesus" because of the way his arms are raised. Some call it the drowning Jesus for the same reason.

He is 65 feet high and 40 feet wide, made of (no shit) styrofoam over a steel frame. On June 14th (when the Moon was void of course between Cancer and Leo) this giant Jesus was struck by lightening and burned completely. I am forced to ponder both the astrological and environmental impact of this. I am not sure if Bubba and Earlene living in the trailer a half mile away when tonnage of styrofoam was burning want to have kids anytime soon.

I remember years ago when I was courting my third of fourth wife (they were both from Ohio and I constantly get them confused) I use to drive I-75 and saw this huge Jesus that caused me to think of the song: "Plastic Jesus", it was like that song placed in your head that takes hours to get rid of;

"I don't care if it rains or freezes,
long as I got my plastic Jesus
riding on the dashboard of my car
through all kinds of trials and tribulations
we're gonna travel every nation
me and my plastic Jesus will go far

and I don't care
if it is dark and scary
long as I have my Magnetic Mary
sitting on the dashboard of my car
cause she won't slip
yeah she won't slide
you know her ass is magnetised
sitting on the dashboard of my car

And when things
are cold and clammy
I got me the whole damn Holy Family
sitting on the dashboard of my car..."

This giant coffee cup statue sat as an advertisement for an evangelical mega-church. I bet Sunday Services there will for many months be overwhelmed by the odor of such a fire.

Who says Divinity lacks a sense of humor?

Keep an eye on Texas

Yeah, something big is fixin to happen in the Lone Star State...

Obama worth a second vote?

http://www.whitehouse.gov/deepwater-bp-oil-spill/

I voted for Obama. That vote makes me feel like a red headed step child.

Ok it is like more than time to call it. It is a fact! Hillary was right at the 3 am wake up call Obama would suck. Well this is it! The 3 am wake up call that lasts to destruction....not a good guy to answer. Obama does indeed suck!

He fucked us on "don't ask don't tell", he fucked us on health care with the public option, he fucked us on withdrawal from Afghanistan. Now he is fucking us on the enviroment. I think it is beyond time those of us who believed in change said to him: "FUCK YOU!

He is not what I voted for! No brand can sell him.

A Poem Thrown Out.

Stones, Guitars and Getting Old.
A Poem, at last for just me.

I recently cut a stone.
Experienced the grind of sanding
The smell associated with the lie
Stones are cut, they ain’t.
They are glorified sanded
Worn to desire.
No brilliant chisel
No saw to measurement
Stones are cut by a course wheel and time.
The very definition of disappointment.
Soaked in water as done
Looking for errors…

I got a guitar this year for my birthday
A hellava gift to a man who owns 76 guitars.
This one was special, handmade in a garage
Stopping me with a living room look
By a dying Sedao Yari
One of 50 offered to the universe
One I have chased for more than half my life
My wife wanted to send me a message
That she watches my desires from the shadows
And loves me to an expensive point.
where only wood leads to a decent sound
And even purfling must be organic….

Which leads me to age, and glances in the mirror
An understanding that experiences become stories told
Even the scary ones, fade and yellow with time.
Danger felt and lived with long enough becomes doodling
Gray scratches no one cares about…

Stones cut to remember youthful talent
Guitars bought to confirm the purpose of presence
Poems to educate age….In my survival?

I suppose that is all I can quietly hope for.

-A.D. Fischer

Angles Can Distort Perceptions

Here are two pictures that belong side by side. The first is Muhammad Yunus, the Nobel Peace prize winner for 2006. The Ceo of Grameen Bank. The second is Tony Haywood, The CEO of BP who killed the Gulf of Mexico, and possibly the East Coast.

One of these guys is a good guy, and one should flat ass be put to death. One has a planetary award for good things, one has a history of destroying the planet. One was filthy rich, one struggled to make ends meet.

Can you tell by the picture?

This may indeed be the first recorded death of the BP Gulf Disaster. It is a photo of a bird clinging to the side of a boat offshore on May 9th, 2010.

It has no idea what has happened. All it knows is that something is changing it's life for the worse. It can not fly, it is suffacating in movement. It is at the side of a boat begging to be helped!

It is the closest thing a wild thing will come to prayer. Head up and begging.

Dice Divination

One of the coolest things I own is an ancient Roman dice cube. It is cut from a piece of ivory. It has been certified by the curators of Christies Auctions out of London as a "BC Item". 200 years BC. I bought it over the telephone many years ago.

Why? I suppose it has to do with my fascination with Divination. One of the oldest forms of divination was rolling dice. It was also one of the most vague forms of Divination.

In it's most ancient form, four rolls of the dice were completed. Keep in mind I use the word "dice" anciently. Multiple rolls of a single cube was known as rolling dice.

I have always been amazed how tools that started out as a form of divination always seem to result in games of chance and gambling. I have in my life found that the most degenerate gamblers are also those who read Tarot, or divine with dice, or numbers, or even stars.

My research into "Divination With Dice" has led me to conclude that those who did such viewed life as being seperated into 6 different phases. They are:

1. Birth

2. Consistency

3. Growth

4. Maturation

5. Fulfillment

6. Renewal

Now to Divine with Dice requires a total of 4 rolls. The first roll would take you to a consideration of one of 6 aspects of life as described above. Life is full of the dualities, the ups the down, the light and the shadows. So the second roll of the dice would be the positive aspect of the situation again using the list above. The third roll would be the negative aspects of the situation. The final roll would be the "conduct required" roll again based upon the list above. Like all forms of divination things will be vague and left to astound the imagination.

So lets give this ancient dice rolling a try shall we? Lets look at the most trying situation facing us today. The oil spill in the Gulf. Our first roll would consider how it effects life. (I am now going to roll my overly expensive and ancient cube:

Rolling and tossing.....

1. Birth, this gushing is definately a new birth. It will lead to an entirely new way of viewing how life is to be lived in the Gulf Coast. Not every birth is joyful, but every birth leads us to a new way of thinking.

Now the positive sides of this Birth:

Rolling and Tossing.....

2. Consistency. This roll speaks of the positive. Survival is the most constent aspect of life. We also need to consider the consistency of screw ups. Humanities history is filled with them. The positive side of consistency can scream volumes about what we allow to be normal.

Now the negative or shadow side of this original roll of birth:

Rolling and Tossing.....

6. Renewal. Now this is somewhat frightening. The negative aspects of the Oil Spill in the Gulf is "renewal". Almost and so damn close to transition. "New and Improved" is substantially different than the weather tested "standard". Considering this is the shadfow side? "Renewal" will be painful.

Now our final roll, the "conduct required" roll:

Rolling and tossing.....

4. Maturation. Everytime we mature we lose the benifits and innocence of Childhood. I am mindful of the grandfather who enticed his child to jump from a height to be caught in loving arms. Then again to encourage a child to jump a second time to step away and allow the child to hit the floor. Explaining that when caught is how life should be, when hitting the floor is how life is. Maturity demands we think beyond innocence, we see things for what they are. When you are 14 nothing is like it was when you 9. Accept it.

So there is ancient dice divination. Vague, but definately thought worthy.

WWJD

I love this photo. It is a picture of the newest Bank Robber to hit Western North Carolina. It was originally offered up to the public by the Law Enforcement Community to help identify him.

Look at his hand....you reckon he was unaware that he is giving the finger to the camera? I just love it!

Two thousand years ago when Jesus himself walked upon this planet, the only people he saw fit to physically beat the shit out of were the money changers in the temple. The bankers of his day. All these years later our bankers confirm that the human condition has not changed in 2000 years.

I recently lobbied my family to stop doing business with The Bank of America. It was a big deal. I have carried on a lifelong relationship with The Bank of America. My family carried on a generational relationship. This last March, my family shut it down, accounts from Arkansas to Maine and every state in between up the Eastern Seaboard. Trust me they felt it, it was a topic of discussion in boardrooms down in Charlotte.

I know this because of two things. One an executive VP from Bank of America called me. I enjoyed the phone call I got to rant to him about how his bank got tax payers to socialize losses while profits were still privatised. I got to tell him how his bank took over 200 billion from tax payers in the tarp bail out and than instantly raised credit card interest rate on those who could least afford it, while investing billions in China!

The second reason I know this is because every month since I and my family cancelled our accounts we all still get statements from the Bank of America that are both frustrating and comical. Seriously, I get a Statement on account number 0006 5491 43** (my deletion, gotta be careful). Everyone in my family gets the same account statement. Somehow 12 bucks gets metaphysically thrown into the account to keep it active but at the end of the statement the balance is zero? Hey the accounts have been closed for months now. Yet we are carried on somehow? These statements scream volumes about the integrity and business practises of the Bank of America.

I got to recently tell an executive VP from the Bank of America that he shouldn't be talking to me. That we no longer have a business relationship. He should be talking to someone from China, who might care about what he has to say. I got to hang up on him and I loved it. It was a multi 7 figure hang up. ROFLMAO.

If a family from the Northeast who just happen to have a vowel at the end of their last name was to conduct business like the Bank of America does? Well it would contribute to prison overcrowding. That is where these guys belong...it is why Jesus would beat them even today.

It is why I love an honest bank robber who flips them the bird while stealing from them like they steal from us.

My Brother's Guitar

Everytime I play your guitar I think of ghosts

and Sweden and what might have been

had you not been our Father's son

I calculate ages...I was nine

when you became a Marine

I was eleven and left behind

when you came home as tears and a telegram

our mother's altar in the corner

where your guitar sat as a testament

to your 24 years, that never collected dust

You know Ma....

Her rules, a collar on the shirt for dinner

a language spoke, Russian and German

didn't count a musical instrument played

the recital of classic poetry, Sunday trivia.

On the doorstep these years later

I think you died running away.

I was 10 the last time I saw you

in Dress Blues before a mirror

you asked me to brush cat hair

before meeting Smokey Joe

at the sportsman grill on Congress

as I swiped just a child across the uniform

you told me "There are perfections in life"

those are bad last words, I didn't realise this

you left with that Freelander girl

who would have thought you were not invincible?

That you would end as such a sibbling shadow.

You were not around for the amazement of divorce

Mother got tight with Christy Pascious

ended up owning half of Portland.

Moved our immigrant asses to blue blooded Kenebunkport

and is still working on membership to the yacht club.

Our Grandfather died, secrets in tact

a helleva funeral, Politicians and Whitehouse representatives

to insure he was silently dead. I came though I too had run away

It happened in my senior year, a dream of you

and Annapolis. A public throwback

led me to the theft of your guitar.

I hitchhiked to Natchitoches LA to see where Jim Croce Died

I stole your guitar and took it with me

played it in a huge field under one tree that stood

stoicly hit by Croce's airplane.

I have owned your 64 Goya Guitar since.

It has been with me around the world

and through the middile of it once,

It has even my sailors mark

a cat's face many years inscribed.

I am now old and grey and fat

I understand this guitar's history

how Martin not wanting to compete

bought them out devastating a town in Sweden

that would have hidden you, had you desired.

I sit on the stoop of my house

playing your guitar, wondering

the discussion we will have,

pondering how we will deal with notes and chords

If when we meet, I am wiser than you?